Oh how I love Death Cab for Cutie.  Happy New Years everyone! <3

Late night musings

Soooo lately I've been trying to figure out where I want to go in life... And I gotta say, it isn't reaaaally something I've ever put all that much thought into... But seriously, there are a lot of things I could do... maybe get a doctorate, spend the rest of my life FOR SCIENCE, doing research-y things  (You gotta admit, Dr. Jessie Scott sounds pretty damn cool.).  Travel the world... hide out in a field station observing some animal for months on end... chill in a lab microscoping things and mixing things and looking at DNA... running all the experiments.  Live on a boat, or an RV.  Go skydiving, base jumping, rock climbing, live on a mountain, hang gliding, scuba diving...

Or with a really cute family of my own...

For some reason I can't seem to combine the two in my mind... adventure and a family.  It just doesn't work.  It keeps ending up being family OR adventure.  Cute little family OR living day by day out of an RV seeing the country.  Adorable little family life OR living on a boat for a few months tracking whales and awakening each morning to the sunrise over the ocean...

I don't understand why these two perfectly wonderful futures don't combine in my mind.  Why it can't seem to work out like The Wild Thornberries...  Maybe it just doesn't seem right to said future kid... to be perpetually on the move, never set in one place, no solid home, friends, school, etc.  But I honestly don't know that I ever see myself settling down in one place for too long...

Sometimes I feel like a family would just be another thing getting in the way of my adventure... more mouths to feed, more plane tickets to buy, more things to worry about in this crazy world...  Maybe the problem is I care too much...

But again, how adorable would a kid be who grew up on Matt and Kim and The Little Prince and nights stargazing and adventuring around like they lived in The Wild Thornberries?  A kid who grew up on science...

Idk... I still don't know where I stand on the whole thing.  I think part of me is just terrified of losing the freedom I have of being able to do WHATEVER the hell I want, and it not severely affecting anyone in such a way that it could ruin their entire future...

But this is an awful lot of worrying for something that's years and years in the future.  No way I'd be settling down right now and thinking about a family... that's just absolutely absurd.  I've got a great good many years of adventure ahead of me before anyone could even possibly get me to stay in one spot for an extended period of time.

Something about being stuck in one place just terrifies me.

.... that moment where you find yourself dancing around to Foster the People in Converse shoes and recognize you're slipping into hipsterdom....

Also when your parents switch internet providers and you can't get onto the email that you use for everything... not entirely sure what this means for everything I use THROUGH that email account; i.e. facebook, etsy, amazon, this blog, etc etc etc

Should be interesting...

so many random thoughts rambling around my head that my brain feels empty...

I think I need to get back into reading books... I feel like they actually increase knowledge while providing entertainment, unlike TV shows...

also my pandora station hates me all of a sudden. it was filled with adorable indie songs and now its just... not.

and who decided it was a cool thing to make textbooks so expensive when everything else regarding school is so expensive? this is just mean spirited at this point.

I think I could also use a beach day... because its been too long.

Also my attempt at making song lyric jewelry failed more or less horribly in that the ink bled everywhere into the superglue and thus making everything weird colored...

Also happy christmas eve to my readers.  This christmas should be interesting in that EVERYONE was pestering me for gift ideas and I didn't know what to tell ANY of them because I'm really content with everything... I'm so happy I get to see my cousins tomorrow <3

I think my attention span is disappearing...

I've also just determined that school took the fun outta reading...

Everything is elipses... ellipses? yep. spellcheck likes ellipses... except now i'm apparently spelling spellcheck wrong so that's cool...

OH. MY GOD. FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE. Sometimes I feel like throwing my hands up in the air, I know I can count on you. Sometimes I feel like saying, "Lord I just don't care." but you've got the love I need to see me through.


the other day I couldn't remember the phrase "wasting energy" so I settled on the idea that the light that was on that no one was using was "destroying the universe." a valid substitute in any book.


.... i never kept up with that picture a day thing... and now I'm a little sad I failed...

its probably bedtime now seeing as i'm gonna be rudely awoken tomorrow to clean then sit around and wait to go to my cousin's house...

random train of thoughts is random...


I need more facts.

This is fact not fiction, for the first time in years. - Death Cab for Cutie

That moment when you realize a person on etsy sells customizable song lyrics necklaces and promptly proceed to go broke.

I'm the best at remembering this exists...

So about the lack of posts I have going on lately...

HAVE A VIDEO.

Me as a Hipster xP

scarily accurate... sincerely debated putting square framed glasses on it because i friggin love square framed glasses...

in other news, my id card now gets me into the research wing of the biophysics building on campus, and Nyholm lab is working on getting me keys to two buildings, the lab, and the squid room! and i get to take care of baby squids who are friggin adorable and 1cm - 2cm big, annnnnnd Bethany, the post-doc who runs the lab when Nyholm isnt around is hosting a game night, and I'm on a texting/first name basis with her and Barrett, and I can't handle how cool this is.  I'm a real scientist!!! xP

wicked sweet art

Beautiful artwork by a beautiful person <3

Save the Bats.

I think my crazy activism has managed to latch onto something finally.  Quite frankly, extinction freaks me out, and if you read any of the articles I posted in my last three posts, you'll realize that the bats are disappearing at an alarming rate due to a fungal infection that causes them to either: a. waste away while they're hibernating, or b. wake up early from their hibernation and then proceed to starve to death in frigid winter conditions.  Now I don't know about you, or how you feel about animals, or whether or not you have a fear of bats, but one thing's for sure, you cannot possibly like mosquitoes.  So think of how awful its going to be when the bats are all gone and there's hardly anything to save us from those godawful bugs that cause never ending itchiness and spread disease like its nobody's business.

Once again, I can't speak for you, but I definitely feel better knowing there are bats out there eating up the mosquitoes.  If you too are terrified of the upcoming extinction of bats then its time you let your voice be heard.  Please please use the lovely forms and contact information on this website to harass your governmental representative, because something seriously needs to be done.

Thanks a million,
Jessie

Goddamnit

Just... seriously... Something needs to be done... This is just messed up...

But I love bats...

D:

Extinction freaks me out.

I love bats... Dx

Some Photos

This is how I spent my night xD Bucky Balls are insaaaaane. (September 10)

This is how I got into the InstantDaily for the first time ever. TROGDORRRRRRR!!!!! (September 14)

Can't seem to stop listening to this... its just too adorable...  Thanks to Elizabeth <3

I love his smile after he says, You're the one. - Tinashe

Something's gotta give. Also don't read if you like eating meat and want to stay oblivious.

Apparently the U.S. consumes 207% of its ecological capacity, according to this article. I just don't understand what its going to take to get people to understand that its not alright to keep up this way and that shits gotta change in a drastic manner in order for things to work out alright... Why doesn't everyone else see the beauty of solar energy, its legitimately just about free, pays for itself in no time, harvesting the sun.  And if there are ways around using oil, then why haven't we started using them yet?  Get the solar energy to power the solar panel making company to power more solar panels to power everything else that we mess up by using oil.  And we need to stop being dumb about food too.  Its not alright to give people meat that comes from cows that are standing knee deep in their own shit... or chickens that are bred to have more meat to them and therefore their muscles develop faster than their organs can handle and the things cant even stand up for more than two seconds.  I tried to eat chicken fingers the other day and I just couldnt even look at them.

Something's gotta give.

"I want my money back, I'm down here drowning in your fat, you got me on my knees praying for everything you lack.  I ain't afraid of you, I'm just a victim of your fear, you cower in your tower praying that I'll disappear.  I got another plan, one that requires me to stand.  On the stage or in the street, don't need no microphone or beat.  And if you hear this song, if you ain't dead then sing along, bang and strum to these here drums 'til you get where you belong.

I got a list of demands, written on the palm of my hand. I ball my fist and you gonna know where I stand. We're living hand to mouth! You wanna be somebody, see somebody try to free somebody.  I got a list of demands written on the palm of my hand." - Saul Williams

Figuring Things Out

TWENTY NINE JACKS OF CLUBS. WTF. I was seriously dying laughing for about a half hour. (September 1)

Ahhhhhhhhhhh little motor protein!!! ITS TOO DAMN CUTE! It walks along the little cytoskeleton fibers and is just generally friggin adorable xD Jenna's roomie said, "You can't get upset reading about cells, proteins are too fucking adorable!" And  I agree completely. xD (September 6)

If I ever start complaining about college, please ignore me.  Sure my room's tiny, sure I have lots and lots of homework, and it SURE is tricky figuring out just what I want to do, but I promise you I am enjoying myself.  I have all this freedom and time and space to figure out what I want to do with my life, I have so many resources at my fingertips, I have a wonderful adviser who responds to my emails with lots of detailed information about any of the questions I ask, and I honestly love the majority of my classes.  I'm finally learning things I'm interested in learning about, and figuring out how to be my own person.  I promise you all, I am having fun figuring things out <3 I've currently filled my schedule with classes, club meetings, and events run by the Honors program looking into career fairs and research opportunities.  I will figure everything out at some point xD

In other news, I've pretty much completely become a hippie xD But a technologic hippie? If that's a thing... I have a solar charger for my phone/ipod/etc, a power strip that I can turn off using a little clicker to conserve energy, a reusable cup, biodegradable pens, and I'm almost successfully a vegetarian.  I'm gonna reduce my impact on the environment, and maybe try and figure out how to do some research to help it or volunteer somewhere.  I'm also probably going to join the EcoHusky club on campus, because I think its a bunch of kids with the right idea xD  It just makes me really happy every time I use my little biodegradable pens or my solar charger, knowing that I'm doing something good.

Thank you for opening the window, the sky is clear as my mind is now, I was a long, long way off.  Join me in welcoming the sun in, its much brighter than the night I hid in, I was a long, long way off. And I think I like how the day sounds, like how the day sounds through this new song. - Greg Laswell

Tangled Threads

My head is going a million miles a minute and reaching no solid conclusions about anything.  There are too many things I want to do and not enough time in the day to do them.  Also surprise, my course load is obscenely difficult, but we'll see how it goes.  I currently can't decide if its worth my while to try and take the hard, 2 semester sequence of organic chemistry, or the overly easy 1 semester organic chemistry.  The part that freaked me out was sitting in the 1 semester organic chemistry class I'm currently enrolled in, the professor said that if anyone is majoring in Molecular and Cell Biology or Physiology and Neurobiology that they need to be in the harder chemistry sequence.  My course load is already a bit overwhelming, so why on earth would I switch to the harder one?  Is it going to afford me more opportunities later on in life?  I don't know yet... I feel like either way I'm going to be kicking myself no matter which way I go on this one... I'll probably end up switching on the off chance that not switching limits my opportunities...

Regardless, I feel like I need a calming force in my life.  I can literally just sit somewhere while my head goes round and round in circles not ever reaching any sound conclusion and just fidget.  And I can't drop things until I figure out wtf I'm doing with them, so it honestly never ends until I get myself so worked up over nothing it seems like the world's ending.

Time for Intro to Undergrad Research...
 
'Cause I'm a man who hides from all that binds in a mess of fading lines.  And there's a tangled thread inside my head with nothing on either end. - Death Cab for Cutie

Transitions

After saying goodbye to Josh, I found this car. (August 21)

This picture defines their friendship xD (August 24)

(August 24)

It'll fit, right? (August 25)

UConn here I come. (August 26)

Uncovering galaxies. (August 27)

This is the coolest bubbler ever <3 (August 28)

Gorgeous campus after a hurricane. Also James and Erin because they're adorable <3 (August 29)

Green roof on the new classroom building! Its adorable and made my day. (August 30)

Its been a long time since I've had to walk great distances... my legs are on fire, but its almost like coming home again... I miss my home friends the size of universes, its ridiculous.  But back on campus I have the friends that I live with.  Its a bizarre transition.  I just want to be outside all the time on the rolling hills.  The wind here is something else... Its enough to take your breath away.

I don't think I'm making any logical sense... Time to head off to Animal Cognitive Behavior.

Bruises and scrapes, our life's mistakes are nothing but bad weather.  Hope you'd sneak in all of our friends just so we could leave together.  The books I won't read, the air that I'll breathe, the colors I've seen, I'll leave these pages in the trees. Today, leave good for great, leave sleep for late, leave good for great. - Matt and Kim

Activist Goals

- eat organic/local/vegetarian
- grow my own veggies
- enlighten others
- be more aware
- purchase a solar panel
- buy an electric car once available/financially feasible

I think its about time for a revolution.

So here's the forewarning to this entire post, I just watched Food Inc. on a recommendation from Charlie.  I swear she's trying to make an activist out of me...

Watching that documentary, all I can really say is our food system is fucked up.  And I honestly don't understand how people haven't thrown a fit over it yet... Cows getting e. coli because they're standing ankle deep in their own shit and eating corn when their bodies are made to process grass, which by the way, switching them to a grass diet for a day kills 80% of the e. coli infecting them.... Companies making it impossible to get sued meanwhile silencing farmers and the general populace by threatening them with taking away their jobs, never ending legal battles that take away their meager livelihoods, patents destroying any farmer's hopes of growing their own food because they can't keep their own seed and if their crops get contaminated by pollen from a Monsanto crop then they have to fight legal battles with Monsanto... Animals that never see the light of day because the meat companies think its unsanitary for them to be outside...

I just can't even handle this... there is NOTHING that is alright with any of this.  I think this has just sealed the deal on me becoming a preferred vegetarian, in that I'll eat local meat, but none of this large corporation nonsense... Someone needs to stop them... And I'm gonna do my damnedest to make a difference.

There's something wrong with the world when FOUR companies control all the meat produced in the entirety of the United States.  They have so much power that if any of the farmers try to fight them, they can just fire them like its nothing.  And to the company, it truly isn't anything.  But to the farmers, they've lost their entire livelihood.

I'm going to completely refuse to accept this anymore.  Its time to enact some change.

If you're interested in watching Food Inc, it can be found online for free probably illegally... here.

Apparently this is my 100th post... And here I was just popping onto blogger to say that:

Sometimes I'm just too happy to sleep.  Sometimes a day has been far too wonderful, and I don't want it to end just yet, so I'll stay up late to make it last that much longer...

Every day I'm shuffling. - LMFAO

This was a triumph. (August 17)

Happy 20th birthday, Jen. xD (August 19)

OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS CAR. (August 21)

Because i love us.

(august 7)

(august 10)

(august 10) Glow in the dark moose-octopus chris made

silly birds (august 11)

<3 (august 11)

the silly bird that started it all (august 11)

walking on clouds (august 11)

not quite napping (august 11)

<333 (august 11)

I'M JUST GONNA JUMP IN THE BOAT. (august 13)

WHY AM I PACKING HERE AND HOW DID I GET RAT POOP ON ME. (august 15)

a hippie and a hipster walk into a newbury comics... (august 17)

My Munchkin and I

courtesy of Manda <3

Also these.

Bubbles.

In which I take a billion self portraits for lack of a model, and hate them all.

go figure there's a curtain rod coming out of my forehead in one of the only photos i like...

=/

this makes me feel narcissistic that I took so many photos, yet extremely aggravated that I liked next to none of them...  I need faces other than my own to photograph.

It really is high time I tried to rediscover my creativity... Lately my photos have been me just trying to keep all my days straight... I want to do some people portraits.

EDIT: ASK AND YOU SHALL RECIEVE. *headdesk* I just wish Phil didn't start trying to roundabout-ly explain everything artsily at 2:30am....... Do people not understand that my brain turns off at 8pm?

Life is made up of the wonderful memories that you string along and trail behind you like a bunch of glowing lights.

Note to self...

Don't ever guilt trip anyone for anything ever.  If you want something and someone says no, just get over yourself and find a way to deal.  Because being on the receiving end of a guilt trip sucks.

It might not be the right time.  I might not be the right one. But there's something about us I want to say 'cause there's something between us anyway.  I might not be the right one.  It might not be the right time.  But there's something about us I've got to do, some kind of secret I will share with you.  I need you more than anything in my life.  I want you more than anything in my life.  I'll miss you more than anyone in my life.  I love you more than anyone in my life. - Daft Punk

Touche shuffle, touche.  I can't ever say no to that song.  Its just so short and jazzy and perfect, and the way his voice trails off at the end, genius.  Pure musical genius.

Dale Chihuly is inspiration.

Today I saw the Dale Chihuly exhibit at the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston, and it was absolutely incredible.  Words cannot describe how lovely his glass artwork is.  I loved the looks of awe on absolutely EVERYONE's faces.  Definitely made me smile.  Also an entire ceiling filled with glass with light shining through it.  I want one.

I don't want to set the world on fire, I just want to start a flame in your heart. - The Inkspots